Wanted to have a permanent memory (not that I'll be able to forget - even Alzheimer won't take this from me) of our failure and success on Matterhorn, so I wanted to buy a poster. I roamed the streets of Zermatt looking for the poster. It's a specific one, with the Horli ridge blown up and the route drawn with a yellow line with markers (in English) showing the important points in the route. You see, I knew which poster I wanted because it dominates the staircase in Marius's home. I have looked at it for years now. My trouble was that I was indeed roaming the streets of Zermatt, but I was doing it at lunchtime when all the shops are closed. Except for a house.
More of a restaurant really, with a crowded souvenir shop at the first floor. I knew it was crowded and crammed because I could peep inside. My poster was shown outside and there was something written in German on top of it. Maybe 20 letter words, anyhow I was confused. The shop was locked but there was an arrow pointing to the restaurant entrance. There, at the bar, the waitress didn't know English and I didn't know German or swiss. The people having lunch were staring at me (my face was burned and because I was so damn tired I would sometimes stumble) but I really didn't care. I finally left. Didn't go far until I realized that maybe the other words written next to a bell meant "Ring really really hard if it's between 12 and 2". So I went back.
And I rang and I rang until an old man showed up at the balcony above (balcony full of flowers, of course). So he came down smelling of lunch and I pointed to the poster. He unlocked the shop and we went in. It was very very crammed with all the possible wood carved artifacts and souvenirs that you could imagine ever buying from Switzerland. Masks, towels, cows, small matterhorns, big matterhorns, edelweisses, flutes, little sheperds, everything. It also had that smell you get from really old, woody houses. The old man asked me if I really wanted the poster, I said yes, payed and left happily.
Today I put it up in my lab. It does take away half of the precious light from my window, but I don't mind. The markers are written in German. It's not the same angle so it doesn't look as BIG as the one I wanted. The lower edge has scissors marks, like those that remain when you can't cut a piece of paper straight and you keep trying to return to your imaginary straight line. I love it.
Showing posts with label matterhorn. Show all posts
Showing posts with label matterhorn. Show all posts
Thursday, September 18
Wednesday, September 10
Rocks are meant to fall
So we finally managed to get ready, Radu finally woke up (sort of) and proceed to the beginning of the Hornli Ridge route on Matterhorn. I had been dreaming about this route on an off for about 8 years now. And here begins the chase. It was still pitch dark (3:45 am) and we couldn't see the route so we had to really hurry about the teams of guide and client that where very far from us. We were the second last team to climb, followed by a japanese guy and his wife (they would turn back in the end).
Mistake no 1: Instead of going in a team of 2, we went in a team of 3. This meant that our time doubled.
Mistake no. 2: We took a rookie with us. Rookie to the point where I would have to be two or three meters behind Radu just so that I could tell him where to step and what rocks to hold.
We were slow, very very slow. The route was very snowed in, which meant that we couldn't find almost any pitons or anchors or anything. This meant that we were more or less climbing without any safety points. Were Marius to fall, I don't know if our belay station would hold so he had good chances of pulling us off with him. It also meant that by midday when the snow would melt rocks would be tumbling down. But about that later. Just before we got on the ridge (Marius ahead, followed by Radu and then by me), Marius stepped up and entered the ridge, then Radu stepped up too. Only that, instead of stepping exactly where he saw Marius step, he stepped on a BIG flake that was not so solid. The flake dropped away to the right, he slipped, I put my hands on his butt and pushed him back (thank god for spotting at bouldering), japanese woman behind screamed, Marius freaked. Marius would de-freak about 20 hours later.
And there we were. Very slow again, snail like. We had to put on our ice crampons four hours before the point where you normally put on your crampons. Marius wanted to turn back two times but I didn't. I did my best to stay fresh and smiling. Maybe that freaked him out more too.
We passed the Solvay emergency hut. This is where guides get their clients air-lifted when they can't go anymore. It costs 1000 Euro, by the way. I asked Radu if he wanted to stay behind and wait for us at the hut, while at the same time talking to marius (Marius was saying that he should stay behind). But he wouldn't so we continued. Because we were still wearing our crampons we had to do mixed snow-rock climbing, something for which i guess they weren't ready. I know I was.
Very few teams were passing us going down. Most of them said that it was very hard up there. The damn fog was surrounding us. What was creepier was the damn helicopter that was circling the mountain (you could hear it, it was very close but you couldn't see the bastard).
It was 12:30 by now and the french guide that was coming from the summit stopped next to us. He tried to speak in english just for our benefit, telling us it would be better to go down. He wouldn't leave until I assured him we were going down. I started to cry. Marius (who was leading on the slab) turned and asked me what should we do (he had already said once again that he wants to go back). I didn't answer at first, trying to contain the tears from my voice. As I was looking away I remembered all these memorial plaques that we had passed. I cleared my voice and said "FUCK IT, I WANT TO LIVE, LET'S GO!" This is our summit picture, you could say.
And at about 1, 1:30 pm begins our descent. We were again very slow because there were three of us. Radu was also maddeningly slow on the rappel. I know now that I will never go with rookies I don't know. When we couldn't find rappel points I would belay Marius on the descent, then Marius and I would belay Radu, then I would go back. It took us ages. The only thing I am proud about is that we didn't lose the way (I had remembered most of the rappel points that I saw when sunlight came). When we rappelled after the Solvay hut, I was holding the ropes to untie the knot when one stone the size of a fucking plate came down just where we were coming down. One minute before and I would be writing to you from heaven.
Night came. A small snow storm came. We had two survival foils (like the alluminium foil in which chocolate is wrapped), and there were three of us. We stopped on the ledge the size of a table. Marius set up a anchor point. We sat on our backpacks - Marius on his, then Radu and I on the one that Radu initially carried and then I took over (it was my backpack, woohoo). Marius and Radu stayed back to back and Radu held me. My ass is big so I had one buttock on a stone. It was cold. Very cold. Our feet and gloves were wet. Looking back I am surprised how much our bodies can take. In the mean time Vlad was waiting for us and probably going mad with fear and anguish. He tried to light his torch just so we could see where the hut were. Then he was afraid when he didn't see the lights anymore (we were under the foil) that we were gone.
When morning came we were surprised to see that we were exactly on track. And I mean exactly on track. The climbers that were now climbing a much clear Matterhorn were coming straight for us. Even the french guide from yesterday saw us and said hi. Another one said "nice pleasant evening outside?" I said a "yes" and a silent "fuck you". We rappelled the last few parts in a dream like state. I was very exhausted and very dizzy because I hadn't had anything to eat for about 14 hours.
In total, 29 hours and 27 rappels later, we were back in base camp. Vlad was relieved to see us alive. We were extremely glad to be alive. Vlad had bought a plate of rosti with eggs for us the day before. We ate it with our harnesses on (you can see Marius in the picture).
Thinking about Sebi, it makes my hair stand when I think about the fact that they went unroped over there. There are towers of stones and flakes (like in this picture) that are literally waiting for a good excuse to go down. I know that if it weren't for Marius I wouldn't be alive. This time I am proud though that I could hold up my end and at least secure the rear.
Three days later I was still glad to be alive and didn't think so much about the details. Afterwards, when looking back the complete sense of failure would just take the breath out of my lungs and I would be very determined to go back again. Now, after hearing about Sebi, maybe I will take it slowly. Move close to the alps and start slowly again. There are mountains over there that are much more worth it than the Matterhorn. But still...
The rest of the pictures are here.
Mistake no 1: Instead of going in a team of 2, we went in a team of 3. This meant that our time doubled.
Mistake no. 2: We took a rookie with us. Rookie to the point where I would have to be two or three meters behind Radu just so that I could tell him where to step and what rocks to hold.
We were slow, very very slow. The route was very snowed in, which meant that we couldn't find almost any pitons or anchors or anything. This meant that we were more or less climbing without any safety points. Were Marius to fall, I don't know if our belay station would hold so he had good chances of pulling us off with him. It also meant that by midday when the snow would melt rocks would be tumbling down. But about that later. Just before we got on the ridge (Marius ahead, followed by Radu and then by me), Marius stepped up and entered the ridge, then Radu stepped up too. Only that, instead of stepping exactly where he saw Marius step, he stepped on a BIG flake that was not so solid. The flake dropped away to the right, he slipped, I put my hands on his butt and pushed him back (thank god for spotting at bouldering), japanese woman behind screamed, Marius freaked. Marius would de-freak about 20 hours later.
And there we were. Very slow again, snail like. We had to put on our ice crampons four hours before the point where you normally put on your crampons. Marius wanted to turn back two times but I didn't. I did my best to stay fresh and smiling. Maybe that freaked him out more too.
We passed the Solvay emergency hut. This is where guides get their clients air-lifted when they can't go anymore. It costs 1000 Euro, by the way. I asked Radu if he wanted to stay behind and wait for us at the hut, while at the same time talking to marius (Marius was saying that he should stay behind). But he wouldn't so we continued. Because we were still wearing our crampons we had to do mixed snow-rock climbing, something for which i guess they weren't ready. I know I was.
Very few teams were passing us going down. Most of them said that it was very hard up there. The damn fog was surrounding us. What was creepier was the damn helicopter that was circling the mountain (you could hear it, it was very close but you couldn't see the bastard).
It was 12:30 by now and the french guide that was coming from the summit stopped next to us. He tried to speak in english just for our benefit, telling us it would be better to go down. He wouldn't leave until I assured him we were going down. I started to cry. Marius (who was leading on the slab) turned and asked me what should we do (he had already said once again that he wants to go back). I didn't answer at first, trying to contain the tears from my voice. As I was looking away I remembered all these memorial plaques that we had passed. I cleared my voice and said "FUCK IT, I WANT TO LIVE, LET'S GO!" This is our summit picture, you could say.
And at about 1, 1:30 pm begins our descent. We were again very slow because there were three of us. Radu was also maddeningly slow on the rappel. I know now that I will never go with rookies I don't know. When we couldn't find rappel points I would belay Marius on the descent, then Marius and I would belay Radu, then I would go back. It took us ages. The only thing I am proud about is that we didn't lose the way (I had remembered most of the rappel points that I saw when sunlight came). When we rappelled after the Solvay hut, I was holding the ropes to untie the knot when one stone the size of a fucking plate came down just where we were coming down. One minute before and I would be writing to you from heaven.
Night came. A small snow storm came. We had two survival foils (like the alluminium foil in which chocolate is wrapped), and there were three of us. We stopped on the ledge the size of a table. Marius set up a anchor point. We sat on our backpacks - Marius on his, then Radu and I on the one that Radu initially carried and then I took over (it was my backpack, woohoo). Marius and Radu stayed back to back and Radu held me. My ass is big so I had one buttock on a stone. It was cold. Very cold. Our feet and gloves were wet. Looking back I am surprised how much our bodies can take. In the mean time Vlad was waiting for us and probably going mad with fear and anguish. He tried to light his torch just so we could see where the hut were. Then he was afraid when he didn't see the lights anymore (we were under the foil) that we were gone.
When morning came we were surprised to see that we were exactly on track. And I mean exactly on track. The climbers that were now climbing a much clear Matterhorn were coming straight for us. Even the french guide from yesterday saw us and said hi. Another one said "nice pleasant evening outside?" I said a "yes" and a silent "fuck you". We rappelled the last few parts in a dream like state. I was very exhausted and very dizzy because I hadn't had anything to eat for about 14 hours.
In total, 29 hours and 27 rappels later, we were back in base camp. Vlad was relieved to see us alive. We were extremely glad to be alive. Vlad had bought a plate of rosti with eggs for us the day before. We ate it with our harnesses on (you can see Marius in the picture).
Thinking about Sebi, it makes my hair stand when I think about the fact that they went unroped over there. There are towers of stones and flakes (like in this picture) that are literally waiting for a good excuse to go down. I know that if it weren't for Marius I wouldn't be alive. This time I am proud though that I could hold up my end and at least secure the rear.
Three days later I was still glad to be alive and didn't think so much about the details. Afterwards, when looking back the complete sense of failure would just take the breath out of my lungs and I would be very determined to go back again. Now, after hearing about Sebi, maybe I will take it slowly. Move close to the alps and start slowly again. There are mountains over there that are much more worth it than the Matterhorn. But still...
The rest of the pictures are here.
Thursday, August 28
The Matterhorn
Or 29 hrs and 27 rappels.
Been reluctant to talk about this considering the events of this past week. Anyhoo ...
Got out from the glacier and very fast back to Zermatt. Recovered for one day in which the weather was absolutely perfect and just fit to climb the Matterhorn. As it was, we were resting. Of course. I will remember that perfect thursday for as long as I live, I guess. This is because we started for Matterhorn on Friday. I had to be out of Zermatt by midday Tuesday or else I'd miss my plane again. Three people had died on the Matterhorn those two days but I didn't care. One took the wrong turn into oblivion and two others did not put on their crampons and slipped off the mountain.
After three hours of heavy carrying uphill from the cableway station, we got to the Horli Hut, at
an altitude of 3260m. 1700m more or less of climbing left till the summit of Matterhorn. The weather was very good and we were very anxious to climb. Vlad was going to be our support team.
That is until evening came and the weather went bad. We had a very powerful drizzle that night.
Saturday I was lost in depression. I couldn't eat, cried for the entire morning. The vision of my empty bank account, the hours of training, the 9 years of obsessing about Matterhorn, and the total feeling of helplessness were killing me. Bah. That evening it snowed and rained heavily and intermittently. We spent it 4 people crammed in one tent, laughing and telling silly mountain stories in the guys' attempt to make me feel happier. When we went to bed that night I was reconciled with my luck, decided to wrap up everything and call it a day.
By some sick act of faith I had left my alarm clock on. So it rang at 2 am. I woke up and realized that outside there was no sound of rain. Stayed some more in my sleeping bag then finally decided to have a look. The night was wonderfully clear. The sky was full of stars. The Matterhorn was .... snowed, but you could see to the top of it!!! OMG!!! OMG OMG OMG! I slipped quietly back in my sleeping bag. Marius asked a grumpy "how is it". I told him. After maybe 5 minutes more he asked: "do we have enough water?" (to make tea). And so begins the nightmare.
Been reluctant to talk about this considering the events of this past week. Anyhoo ...
Got out from the glacier and very fast back to Zermatt. Recovered for one day in which the weather was absolutely perfect and just fit to climb the Matterhorn. As it was, we were resting. Of course. I will remember that perfect thursday for as long as I live, I guess. This is because we started for Matterhorn on Friday. I had to be out of Zermatt by midday Tuesday or else I'd miss my plane again. Three people had died on the Matterhorn those two days but I didn't care. One took the wrong turn into oblivion and two others did not put on their crampons and slipped off the mountain.After three hours of heavy carrying uphill from the cableway station, we got to the Horli Hut, at
an altitude of 3260m. 1700m more or less of climbing left till the summit of Matterhorn. The weather was very good and we were very anxious to climb. Vlad was going to be our support team.That is until evening came and the weather went bad. We had a very powerful drizzle that night.
Saturday I was lost in depression. I couldn't eat, cried for the entire morning. The vision of my empty bank account, the hours of training, the 9 years of obsessing about Matterhorn, and the total feeling of helplessness were killing me. Bah. That evening it snowed and rained heavily and intermittently. We spent it 4 people crammed in one tent, laughing and telling silly mountain stories in the guys' attempt to make me feel happier. When we went to bed that night I was reconciled with my luck, decided to wrap up everything and call it a day.
By some sick act of faith I had left my alarm clock on. So it rang at 2 am. I woke up and realized that outside there was no sound of rain. Stayed some more in my sleeping bag then finally decided to have a look. The night was wonderfully clear. The sky was full of stars. The Matterhorn was .... snowed, but you could see to the top of it!!! OMG!!! OMG OMG OMG! I slipped quietly back in my sleeping bag. Marius asked a grumpy "how is it". I told him. After maybe 5 minutes more he asked: "do we have enough water?" (to make tea). And so begins the nightmare.
Tuesday, August 26
I am perking up, I am!!
Things have been quite low for me these days, with Sebi's death and all. I look at the pictures of Matterhorn and still can't believe that it could kill someone I know and used to be very close to. It sends shivers down my spine, especially since I was seriously considering soloing it. Now I just don't know anymore.
Ran Army Half Marathon this Sunday. Had a time of 1hr 54 minutes (thought it was a bit better, around 1:50, but nvm). It was my first half marathon for this year, so I think it is still quite ok. Next year I want to be in the top three. Pretty ambitious, but then again I am pretty ambitious too!
This was my first race in which I seriously considered stopping and going back. I was around the third kilometer, doing sub 5 minutes per km, going up hill, so turning around and going back was not only appealing but possible (since I was so close to the starting point). I also started to think about Sebi, about how there's nothing left of him such that in order to identify him they have to take a DNA sample from his mom, about why they were not tied up, about what's the point of all of this if you end up unidentifiable and clearly fuck up those that you leave behind, about how tired I was all of a sudden. The only thing that kept me going was the thought that I had woken Marian up at 5 am in order to come with me to the race, and if I went back now, his lost sleep would have been for nothing. So I kept running and after the 5 km mark I was well again. I guess my first 5 km are indeed my worst.
This year Marian and I will run the marathon together. I am so proud of him that he decided to embark in such a quest, woo hoo!
Ran Army Half Marathon this Sunday. Had a time of 1hr 54 minutes (thought it was a bit better, around 1:50, but nvm). It was my first half marathon for this year, so I think it is still quite ok. Next year I want to be in the top three. Pretty ambitious, but then again I am pretty ambitious too!
This was my first race in which I seriously considered stopping and going back. I was around the third kilometer, doing sub 5 minutes per km, going up hill, so turning around and going back was not only appealing but possible (since I was so close to the starting point). I also started to think about Sebi, about how there's nothing left of him such that in order to identify him they have to take a DNA sample from his mom, about why they were not tied up, about what's the point of all of this if you end up unidentifiable and clearly fuck up those that you leave behind, about how tired I was all of a sudden. The only thing that kept me going was the thought that I had woken Marian up at 5 am in order to come with me to the race, and if I went back now, his lost sleep would have been for nothing. So I kept running and after the 5 km mark I was well again. I guess my first 5 km are indeed my worst.
This year Marian and I will run the marathon together. I am so proud of him that he decided to embark in such a quest, woo hoo!
Friday, August 22
Just found out that somebody I knew (and once considered a good friend, but we drifted apart) died on Matterhorn. They had attempted before 2 years back but had been airlifted. Just now only two of them climbed. They were unroped. Sebi (Sebastian Verga) apparently was overtaking somebody when he slipped or dislodged a rock or a flake the size of a closet and fell. They found him at the base of the Mountain mountain.
Later edit: unidentifiable. I wish I could say more, but words still refuse to form in my mind.
Later edit: unidentifiable. I wish I could say more, but words still refuse to form in my mind.
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